We're in the publishing business!!!Welcome to the first issue of Chaos Digest, the new blogzine for people who love Reader's Digest, but just can't seem to make it through an entire issue without leaving the bathroom or sharing trivial information with other like minded folk.
Chaos Digest covers all the stories that Reader's Digest can't because it ran out of space. Imagine tips on gardening for people who aren't all that interested in gardening in the first place?
How about our monthly column on public education, Oh, Those Schools, by Terry Jackson, a bitter, resentful former public education teacher with a personal axe to grind?
Want your funnybone tickled? We have jokes sent to us that you would swear are from one of those internet sites that your socially retarded 16 year old son subscribes to, you know the one that has a cat playing a piano or a guy getting hit in the stones. And we don't even pay for them.
They're free. That way we don't transfer the cost to you. Pretty cool, don't ya think?
This week the Chaos Digest finds out what's happening to Morgan Fairchild or Madonna or Mandy Moore or some other washed up, washed out blonde. We take in a ball game with George Will and regret it from the get go. What an insufferable ass. But you wanted material and we provide material.
Our staff doctors tell you all kinds of interesting tidbits about avoiding painful surgery with a few ideas your long gone grandmother probably used on your dad against his and any sane child's will. Did you know bellylint and an abrasive personality will keep diberticulitis under control? Bleeding gums may mean your suffering from the gooch or expecting triplets. Warts are Gods' way of balancing that time of month for mountain people in West Virginia. Town hall meeting outbursts can be a thing of the past with some Chink berries and mosquitoe netting made out of hair nits.
All of this and the best political cartoons from people who still think cartooning is a viable way to make a living. Chaos Digest- the blogzine for people who love to read, but hate to spend more than a minute doing it. It's the blogzine for the guy and gal on the go who don't know where they're going.
That's great but what about those of us who are too busy to peruse even a "digest?" Could you possibly supply a summary or "Cliff Notes" version of the Chaos Digest for those of us who are not just "on the go," but who are on the "whiskey a-go-go"?
ReplyDelete