Could man on sofa be an oracle, a prophet, or
a passing fancy? The Chaos Chronicles Reveals All!!!!!
Our crack staff at American Chaos has unearthed evidence that the guy sitting on the sofa in the picture that accompanies this article may have all the answers to world problems. The man, who we will simply call The Sofa Sage from this point on whether we find out his name or not, was freely offering his visionary world paradigm to anybody and everybody who passed him by at his sparsely attended after work get-together. Among the answers he gladly shared with this news service were:
Our crack staff at American Chaos has unearthed evidence that the guy sitting on the sofa in the picture that accompanies this article may have all the answers to world problems. The man, who we will simply call The Sofa Sage from this point on whether we find out his name or not, was freely offering his visionary world paradigm to anybody and everybody who passed him by at his sparsely attended after work get-together. Among the answers he gladly shared with this news service were:
Health care is not a problem as long as you stay healthy!
Global warming, more like global cooling, am I right or am I right?
There is no racism, only people who think everything is racist!
This damned remote doesn't work because the government digitalized our televisions!
If you can't find a job you're either looking in the wrong place or not looking hard enough!
And the nugget that exploded our world order:
The only thing standing between us and Russia is a thin strip of land and a piece of water that is hardly worth mentioning!
We can only present the information that an obviously gifted orator and visionary has placed at our feet and only then will we get a better idea of how this modern day combination of Isaiah, Nostradamus, and Fred in Marketing has transformed this tasteless brown leather sofa in an unmemorable suburban apartment complex into the Fertile Crescent of progressive problem solving. Who says the guys in Quality Control don't know what they're talking about?
The Chaos Chronicles will follow up on this story if this Sofa Sage has anything else to announce to the masses!!
The Chaos Chronicles will follow up on this story if this Sofa Sage has anything else to announce to the masses!!
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