Chaos Kids Club Update

CHAOS
Patty Patriot

K

I

D

S CLUB

NEW PRODUCTS JUST IN TIME FOR THE HOLIDAYS!!!!

Chaos Kids Club is excited to introduce the latest in kidtastic toys!!!

Our very own spokes kid, Patty Patriot, is true to the red, white and blue and great deals for this Christmas. Sorry, Jewish kids, she's not buying that tolerance crap so you'll have to buy your Hannukah junk somewhere else. Patty is strictly about great deals for people who celebrate the birth of the baby Jesus by buying lots of things that tax their family finances and ultimately destroy the happiest of homes.

If you're wondering what to get the kid who has everything and only plans to get more, you may want to pickup The Chris Dodd Connector set complete with Connecticut address, Countrywide loan adjustment, unflattering role in a Michael Moore movie, and dignified head of grey hair. Imagine the hours of fun your child will have peddling influence with the Chris Dodd Connector Set!

Kids loved Blues' Clues and the educational games they could play to satisfy their anxiety provoking yuppie parents, now a new generation can learn how health care gets railroaded by gutless government leaders with the new Blue Dogs. Blue Dogs takes all the elements of Blues' Clues, throws them out for no good reason, and replaces them with interactive games like Turncoat, Party Pooper, and Scaredy Cat. What kid wouldn't want to find that under their tree this year!

Finally, Chaos Kids Club is proud to announce Townhall Meeting, the video game that goes on for hours on end with the kind of graphics that scream "Look at me! Look at me! I'm going to shout you down like a 2 year old, if you don't look at me!" and includes realistic animation right down to foaming mouth, seething rage and psychotic stare. Good luck getting the scary, homeschooled kid down the street out of your basement after he's played an hour of Townhall Meeting.

Chaos Kids Club, the club for everything chaos and kids this Christmas!